Adopting a Purpse

OMG I have a test tomorrow and I haven't started on absolutely anything. Well I was kinda mad over a little thing so I blame my procrastination to that this time XP

Well as for those who do not know or are too far away to see, I cut my hair. It was soooo long ( I had been growing it for a year!) and now its soooo short. This, to tell you the truth, was a much bigger change than I expected it to be. Honestly, I didn't want it to go this short until it was long enough to be donated to the cancer kids. That was my whole purpose on growing my hair. At the beginning of my junior year, I read My Sister's Keeper. The movie came out that summer but I refused to watch the movie without having read the book. Although it took me a little longer to read than most books, I finally finished it and then saw the movie (which was such a disappointment). That is when I took my resolution on growing my hair.

I had one problem though... I hate long hair.

The only other time in which I grew my hair was when my aunt was getting married and she asked me to let it grow a little so her professional hair stylist could do something wonderful with my hair. Little did he do to my hair but in the end I was happy because for the first time in my life was my hair done by a pro (and he was not gay). Of course, as soon as I came back from that trip, I went straight to cut it off. Its not that I'm lazy, its that my hair's anatomy is odd.

When I was little, my hair was cut straight down and with squared bangs. As I started to enter puberty, my hair decided to do so as well and it stated to frizz. Not curl, not wave, frizz. There was nothing I could do to it to either get straight or curl. In fact the first time I had my hair straightened, it was chaotic. I'm kinda glad I could only find one picture with my hair going through that stage... I can't remember who became my hair tutor but I'm glad with what she (or he) advised me to do with my hair. I've had so many different hair cuts and honestly the one thing I had to do was learn to accept my hair the way it was.

I think that is when my hair decided to be curly. Later I was introduced to mousse and a real straightener. Those two things became my buddies. Of course later came other products and items that I will not sit here and list but just know they are there.

The one thing that bothers me the most about this hair cut is that I was not able to meet my goal. I was so set and close! I still have the hair which some people find gross...but I feel like my hair and I were having a close connection for the one time in my life! Both of us were putting up with the other and learning to let go of the past. I was also so close on reaching the minimum required to donate...

Then came my frustration. For the first time in a year I got frustrated. I needed a hair cut! I mean after a year I didn't even dare to trim it because I was afraid I'd be tempted to cut it and well as soon as I walked to to salon... I requested a bob... I just couldn't help it. I mean when I saw the scissors cut that first chunk I felt a knot in my throat. I wanted to just stop right there and just ask for the trim but it was too late. I watched my hair falling with a remorse in me.

Why can't I stick to my goals? My own personal goals. The same thing happened when I tried writing a novel. I stopped just as I got to the end. I wish I could adopt a purpose and actually stick to it. Now I feel as if I had taken a kid's hair away. Maybe a girl's chance to feel beautiful...

siiiiigh.............

Now I have to start over...